She's Gotta Have It: Shit That I Can Relate To

I just binge-watched the remake of She's Gotta Have It on Netflix and it was everything I wanted it to be and more. I remember watching the 1986 version as a young girl from Memphis and I always wonder would my life be similar to Nola Darling when I eventually move to New York? Fast forward to now I can most definitely relate to dating multiple men, pursuing my dreams, and staying true to myself.

Annoying New York Men and Keeping Your Options Open

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been called aye ma, yo baby girl, aye sexy,  and any other nicknames that is annoying. I’ve literally walked out my house looking crazy as hell and these men still don't care and would still try to shoot their shot. I can personally relate to Nola's experience when she was grabbed by a man because that same situation happened to me. I know men can be annoying at times but Spike Lee couldn’t have shown a better visual of what women go through with men especially in New York City. Hell, I'm m at the point where I don’t even make eye contact with men because as soon as you glance their way, he’s going to automatically assume you are interested. I bullshit you not.

After I broke up with my ex-boyfriend a couple of years ago, I decided to be a serial dater. I remember dating at least three guys that were completely different from each other and I was having so much fun with all three of them. From free meals almost every day to a couple dollars here and there, and no commitment to anyone, I was able to focus on what matters the most, ME. What we all can learn from Nola is that there is nothing wrong with keeping your options open as long as you are happy and SAFE (WRAP IT UP HOMEGIRLS! I️ don't trust any man) I always tell my younger homegirls to date around because how else would you know what you don't like if you don't keep your options open. Plus, I absolutely loved seeing all three men and my girl Opal fighting over sis who simply did what she wanted with whom she wanted unapologetically.

Say No to Penis and Social Media

I think every woman can relate to Nola's internal self-care cleanse which included no penis and no social media. Sometimes we get so consumed with everything else that is surrounding us that we forget to take care of ourselves. I think it's important that we carved out some time for ourselves and just do what makes us happy. Whether its food, shopping, or working on your goals, just make it happen. Spending time with yourself is therapeutic to the soul. Trust me. 

You Got to Work the Hustle

Do everything with passion. Learn to trust your intuition and not impulses. Believe in The Universe. Nola was making little money here and there and was struggling with paying her rent on time but she never gave up. Sacrificing is definitely a bitch but it will pay off. Keep striving sis!

And to Spike Lee, Thank You!

If you have any questions that you need advice on, email me at Don't be afraid to ask me any questions, we all been there sis.